beanside | Stuck in the suburbs, you're folding his laundry, got what you wanted, so stop feeling sorry

Well, a whole lot of shit got hashed out yesterday and I didn't sleep worth shit. I woke up every hour or two and had a couple of nightmares in there. It sucked.

Dad's current doctor and my sister really are not a good fit. The doctor isn't the most warm and fuzzy person, possibly a bit neuroatypical. My sister is terrified of making the wrong decision (she's power of attorney, so it kind of falls on her) and she needs someone to talk her through it, and tell her she's doing the right thing. She got a call while she was up doing laundry, and came home in tears, feeling like she was being pressured to get him off the ward.

Then, thankfully, Palliative care called and was awesome. They were gentle and understanding, and since it would actually be hospice that he's going into instead of palliative, they had no stake in the game. After that, we were pretty settled.

Once I cooked dinner, I headed over to visit, and the doctor came into see me as well. I don't know if I'm just a little more neuroatypical, but I didn't have any real problem with her. She's not warm and fuzzy, but maybe I'm just neuroatypical enough that I understood her clearly. It certainly didn't hurt that he was laying there giving a rattling weak cough now and then as he tried/failed to clear the snot out of his lungs.

Later, my sister spoke with the doctor and we confirmed our understanding of hospice and said that his comfort was our only concern, and that we understood that he was going to die. So tomorrow, Hospice will come and evaluate, and hopefully, he'll move sometime tomorrow.

I don't know how fast this is going to go. A few days, a week? I just have no clue. I'm hoping Hospice has a better idea.

All in all, it's just going to be a rough little while.

We've been doing some planning for what we're going to do after the fact. In no way shape or form can we afford the house. Which is a bit sad, but it's just not feasible. So, we've started looking at apartments and have found a few. For now, it looks like we're going to be sticking together. We just can afford a much nicer apartment if there's three of us than if there's two.

We'd like to do a three bedroom, but we might have to settle for a 2, we'll see.

For now, we're kind of in a holding pattern, and we'll see where we go from there.

For nwo, though, I've gotta start getting myself together for work.

Everyone have the best Monday you can Monday