I need a nap.

[beanside]

So, just wanted to pop on this morning to wish everyone a very happy (insert holiday of your choice), and a bright and joyful new year.

I'm (as usual) here at work, counting down the hours until I can leave for a whole two days off. Jess is in San Antonio, visiting her parents. Hopefully, she'll have a wonderful time and Satan won't show up for Christmas dinner like last year. *grin*



I miss her mightily, but as I am now on week three of Celexa, it's much less overwhelming than it might have been, thankfully.

I don't think I'd realized how much I needed the meds. It's not that I was having major depression or anything. It was much more insidious, this low-lying constant blanket of stress that had moved in gradually and sapped my energy, dampened my moods. I didn't realize how much it had affected me until the summer, when we were writing Of Bastard Saints. Then, it was like the fog lightened, and I felt good; creative and energetic and sexual.

I don't feel like that yet. Still have the gallbladder/whatever the fuck it is issue hanging over me, and I'm still not 100%, but I feel so much better. Before, when Jess would go away, there would be tears, and she would be extra stressed because I was so upset, and I would mope around the house.

I still miss her like hell, and I'm sad that I don't have her next to me, of course. She's my wife, and my soulmate and my love. But there's not the sense of despair, or being lost, and ghosting through the days until she returns.

So, yeah. I'm doing pretty well, finally feeling like I have my footing, and can start moving forward. Yay drugs!

*grin*

Comments

[katzb101.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I'm glad you're feeling better for them. If you ever need an ear or just to vent, please feel free. Cause believe me I do know where you're coming from :-)

[maygra.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you're doing better (gall bladder aside *g*) Because yes, you don't have to be in the depths of despair and suicidal for depression or just anxiety to take all the color out your world. So yay for you for finding a solution and gaining a benefit. I'm sorry you midd her -- think of it as ou spreading a little Christmas cheer and all the fun ways to make it up when she gets back.

[bluesister.livejournal.com]

Brain chemicals! Argh. My serotinin troubles present more as anxiety than classic depression. With a touch of OCD. I think they're all chunks in the same brain stew.

My wife put up with over a year of my fretting and compulsive question-asking until she demanded I try meds. Damn! I felt like I'd been let in on a great secret and WTF were other people complaining about life for when they're able to walk around without flashes of doom (if that car were to jump the curb right now...) and their bodies aren't screaming about imminent danger?

So, yes, yay for footing! Yay for drugs! More serotinin for everyone!

[caarirose.livejournal.com]

I passed out last night, sorry *nuzzle* I did email you, but for whatever reason it bounced back at me.

I'm so glad you're doing okay though, sweetie. Because you deserve to have things go smoothly for a change, and then some. *cuddle*

[earthkat.livejournal.com]

So glad teh meds are helping and many good thoughts for you being energetic and sexual ;) Better living thorugh chemistry.

[one-more-cherry.livejournal.com]

Yey drugs, indeed - I'm glad you're doing better *hugs*

Happy Holidays!

[rynnalyn.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I'm so glad that life is lightened for you these days. I myself am more manic than depressed, but I'm consistant and I love my drugs. I hope yours help you to see the world more clearly and love more fully...