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beansideIt's Saturday! A fairly busy Saturday at that. Though I got some of the stuff out of the way early, so it might not be so bad. We went last night and picked up some groceries and hit the dispensary, so that's two things out of the way. I still have to help my sister color the back of her hair, grab my own shower, take Jess to their tattoo consult, and then the work party. It's going to be a busy day, but at least tomorrow I can mostly take it easy.
Yesterday was a total clusterfuck with dad. The agreed upon plan is that we get him up at my lunch, and then I work, and we put him back when I'm done work for the day. Usually it ends up being about 4-5 hours. Lately, though, he's been wanting to go back almost immediately, which means that my lunch break lasts about 10-15 min. I've been resenting the hell out of it, but yesterday nearly had me ready to scream. We got him up, got him settled. That takes about...12 min? Then, I went in the kitchen to break down the Costco grocery delivery into meal sized bags. (No one needs to cook 9lbs of ribs at once.) I'm almost done that (which took about another 10 minutes) and I hear the tv getting louder and louder. (He has earphones that let him hear the tv and no one else.) So, I stuff the last bit of ground beef in a bag, and go out to check. Sure enough, he's unconnected his earphones and is putting the tv louder and louder trying to make it come back. I told him I'd fix it, and did, but he was very unhappy. Right then, I knew he was going to do it again, and sure enough, he says "put me back to bed." We pointed out that it's better for his lungs to sit up, and he says "If I die, I die." Dear reader, I nearly had a rage blackout. I bit my tongue and we put him back to bed, and got him situated. By the time that was done, I had a whole 3 minutes of lunch to sit and relax. I was so angry I couldn't see straight. I wanted to just scream and sob and say unforgivable things. Instead, I made coffee and rice and went back to work.
I just really resent giving up 95% of my lunch break every goddamn day. This job is not easy. I have to be on every time the phone rings (53 calls yesterday) and by the end I'm really tired. A 40 min break midday would be really helpful. I'm just so angry at him, and I don't quite know what to do with it.
It doesn't help that the pulling and tugging getting him up and putting him back to bed is hard on my shoulder. It's not the pain like when I reach above my head, it's just an...awareness of the muscle. If it gets any worse, I don't know what I'll do. At least I was able to move my MRI up to Monday night. Of course, then it's the question of who is going to give me the results. I got an email yesterday that the office closed, effective the day that I went. My doctor doesn't seem to be on the website for any of their other sites, so I have no clue. I assume someone is going to tell me. Fortunately, I'll have the results long before then, as they'll download to my Hopkins patient portal automatically. She also gave me a prescription for muscle relaxants and steroids. I'm holding the steroids til after the MRI, just so it shows the reality of the inflammation and...whatever it is that I'm dealing with.
Okay, time to go grab a shower and get ready for the day. Everyone have a wonderful Saturday!
Yesterday was a total clusterfuck with dad. The agreed upon plan is that we get him up at my lunch, and then I work, and we put him back when I'm done work for the day. Usually it ends up being about 4-5 hours. Lately, though, he's been wanting to go back almost immediately, which means that my lunch break lasts about 10-15 min. I've been resenting the hell out of it, but yesterday nearly had me ready to scream. We got him up, got him settled. That takes about...12 min? Then, I went in the kitchen to break down the Costco grocery delivery into meal sized bags. (No one needs to cook 9lbs of ribs at once.) I'm almost done that (which took about another 10 minutes) and I hear the tv getting louder and louder. (He has earphones that let him hear the tv and no one else.) So, I stuff the last bit of ground beef in a bag, and go out to check. Sure enough, he's unconnected his earphones and is putting the tv louder and louder trying to make it come back. I told him I'd fix it, and did, but he was very unhappy. Right then, I knew he was going to do it again, and sure enough, he says "put me back to bed." We pointed out that it's better for his lungs to sit up, and he says "If I die, I die." Dear reader, I nearly had a rage blackout. I bit my tongue and we put him back to bed, and got him situated. By the time that was done, I had a whole 3 minutes of lunch to sit and relax. I was so angry I couldn't see straight. I wanted to just scream and sob and say unforgivable things. Instead, I made coffee and rice and went back to work.
I just really resent giving up 95% of my lunch break every goddamn day. This job is not easy. I have to be on every time the phone rings (53 calls yesterday) and by the end I'm really tired. A 40 min break midday would be really helpful. I'm just so angry at him, and I don't quite know what to do with it.
It doesn't help that the pulling and tugging getting him up and putting him back to bed is hard on my shoulder. It's not the pain like when I reach above my head, it's just an...awareness of the muscle. If it gets any worse, I don't know what I'll do. At least I was able to move my MRI up to Monday night. Of course, then it's the question of who is going to give me the results. I got an email yesterday that the office closed, effective the day that I went. My doctor doesn't seem to be on the website for any of their other sites, so I have no clue. I assume someone is going to tell me. Fortunately, I'll have the results long before then, as they'll download to my Hopkins patient portal automatically. She also gave me a prescription for muscle relaxants and steroids. I'm holding the steroids til after the MRI, just so it shows the reality of the inflammation and...whatever it is that I'm dealing with.
Okay, time to go grab a shower and get ready for the day. Everyone have a wonderful Saturday!
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Date: 2024-04-27 04:02 pm (UTC)