And then, there's a bearded fetus.

you know, i've now decided that the oscars are only worth watching for two reasons:

first, they give you the opportunity to feel superior by laughing and pointing at the fashion disasters that make their way down the red carpet, a fact made all the more amazing because half of those people didn't dress themselves. they had assistants and designers and stylists all let them out the door in those things.

secondly, they're actually live on the west coast, an honor usually reserved for events considered as important as college and nfl football or um, college and nfl football.

you have only to look at the list of things that have won (um, _braveheart_ as best picture? i don't think so) and the list of people who never won one (alfred hitchcock, among others) and the list of the oscar for most deep seated academy guilt (whoopi goldberg for _ghost_ instead of _the color purple_) to know that like most other things in this very screwed up town it's all about surface and buzz and nothing of substance.

at least, peter jackson has the right attitude, and if we're lucky we'll get to see some pda from the lord of the rings contingent, which is just about as grabby as a boyband or a hockey team.